You Can Leave Your Hat On

"Nice hat!" the golden-haired young woman said to me as I exited the Green Mill with thespian Jenna Friday night.

My suave response, a mumbled "thanks."

Two seconds later better responses flooded my mind. It's what the French call l'esprit de l'escalier. The literal translation is "stairway wit." According to the Gospel of Wikipedia, an episode of Seinfeld was devoted to the topic titled "The Comeback" and Cheers commonly had characters think of witty remarks as they ascended the stairs.

It's one of the most frustrating things to not have a great remark immediately. Most of the time I'm on my game, but every once and a while a momentary brain glitch occurs.

The initial thoughts for response were "nice face," which I have since found out could have been construed as an insult. So I revised it to "nice everything" or "nice phone number." The winner probably would have been the prior.

Another beef of mine is that the incident occurred as I was leaving. Why do people say things to you as you are leaving (aside from goodbye)?

Here's Your Hat. What's your hurry?

Of late, I have received a few compliments on my chapeau. It is what I refer to as an "old man's hat." Tweed, 1920s newsie-style cap. The first compliment came at the Jewel as I was checking out. Later that night I received another mention. This city seems to love my hat. I must say that my head was quite warm as I slept in the hat.

I'd prefer it if it weren't an ancillary article atop my head and say, perhaps, my movie star looks that were garnering comments, but I'll take what I get.

My decision to wear the hat at all times is similar to the decision of not washing your face after a kiss on the cheek. Which reminds me of a story my grandpa told. When he was young, he had a date which apparently ended quite well with him having lipstick all over his face. When he told the story his voice possessed a sense of childhood glee and pride for his prowess. He woke his dad to show him the evidence.

Also for perusal, is this site. It compiles submissions of witty retorts thought of after the fact from people around the world.

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Listening to: Clifford Brown - If I Had You
via FoxyTunes