Splish Splash

The joys of unemployment and summer never cease. With a pal from university, I headed to the local water park for an afternoon of slides, ogling and luke warm agua. Leaving my Venice Beach lifeguard shirt at home, I had hopes of a possible Sandlot moment, where I'd be rescued by my very own Wendy Pfeffercorn.

It should be mentioned that my swimming ability is on par with that of the gorillas.

Side note if I may. So, as I was writing the above sentence I researched to find an animal that can't swim. Google led me to Yahoo! Answers. Beyond the numerous comedians, scroll down to Fallin' Angel's (apparently their wings are broken) post. I'm not sure why the person posted their message. Why would you go on Yahoo to promote Google? Do they work for Google? Are they trying to? Is Fallin' Angel a Google disciple, a goociple, if you will? That just sounds like a dessert no one wants.

-"I'm all out of ice cream. Can I interest you in a goociple?"
-"No. It's getting late. I should get going."

In no way does that assist the person. Why would you take the effort to post "check out Google"?

I also learned, according to Betty, that kangaroos can't walk backwards. I'll have to verify if/when I go to Oz.

Back to the pool...with my protective triple coating of Ocean Potion to prevent additional burnage, Brian and I surveyed the park's offerings. There was a kiddy pool with barely enough water to dip in my big toe. But, I'm pretty sure I wouldn't drown in the 2 inches of water. We skipped that and headed for the slides.

There were four slides. Two for body luging and two for tubin'. The teal slide was a leisurely descent into the pool. The pink slide was deceptive. I usually equate pink with peaceful. This slide made me scream like a six- and 3/8 ths-year-old girl. An added benefit was the nasal colonic. This wasn't mentioned in the brochure, if it had there might have been a larger geriatric representation. I think water managed to blast all the way through my sinuses and to my brain.

The tube slides were fun and cushioned my ever sensitive bum from the re-entry.

Another enjoyable activity, in addition to people watching, was the Coral Corral. The ideal for laziness. Step one: sit in inner tube. Step two: let water push you around. That's it. It was pretty relaxing aside from the kids that thought of the lazy river as some sort of bumper tubes game. I decided that someday when I have excess money and a large estate, instead of a moat I'll install a lazy river thing. For when I want to move in the water without any physical effort.

It was a fun time, but the park could have used a regular pool for those interested in that sort of thing. I'm not saying I'm at the stage to be swimming laps but I'd like the option.